YOU'RE WRONG 

An Irregular Column

by Mykel Board

I felt more out of place than a butthair on an Oriental. The great Stonewall 25 homocelebration, homocore night at ABC NO RIO, the International Bisexual Conference and me; a combo made in heaven, you would think. That's the hell of it.

West 28th Street winds through a residential area. Streets in New York don't wind. On Thrusday night, in an adjunct to a laundry room in an apartment complex on a winding street when streets don't wind Liz Highleyman talks about anarchy and sexuality. Blond, but attractive, two-breasted Liz sits in front of an audience and tells them.

"The current Gay Rights movement is not inclusive. In a struggle to achieve respectability, they marginalized those who don't fit in to their mainstream."

I look around the room. A few older guys rock back and forth on the metal chairs. Their hair is Ben Franklined from years on picket lines and behind literature tables. There are younger people too. Some classically anarchist, beards, long hair, with deep wrinkles in their foreheads from contemplating Proudhon.

Yet another crew come from computerland. They're the Bi-list folks. People I've known only computationally. Here, they add faces to the names signed to various messages telling me what an evil person I am.

I wear my Fuck Me I'm Mykel Board shirt so they'll recognize me. Most are friendlier in person than electronically. One pair constantly grope and kiss during the entire talk. They slide their hands over the outsides of eachother's bodies, each curling a cattish tongue around the other's. She, with short dark hair, dressed all in black, would be attractive if she had her lips on something more interesting that another pair. He, with long reddish blonde hair, is also not bad looking. But the combined public display of possession is more than a little annoying-- and distracting. They sit behind me.

"We have to let those who embrace monosexuality have their way." says Liz, slightly louder than the slurping couple behind me. "But we also have to insist that those of us who have other ways also have our rights.'

"You're too tolerant," I shout at her. "Monosexuality itself is deadly. Gay rightists are throwing the rest of us to the wolves. We should not put up with it."

"Yeah! Look what they're doing to NAMBLA!" shouts one of more anarchisty looking young men.

"Man-boy!?!!" shouted a hefty woman sitting in front. "Why is it always man-boy? What happened to women-girl?"

Liz looks toward a calm silver-haired gentleman sitting near the window.

"Well, Tom," she says, "You're from NAMBLA. What about it?"

"We've gotten plenty of calls about women-girl love." he says. "They have the same problems we do."

"Then why don't you change your fucking name and open up a bit," I mean to ask, expressing one of my pet peeves with the organization. But before I can, another voice comes from the audience.

It's a brown-haired white guy, who despite a day's growth of beard looks somehow very wholesome.

"Why can't we all work together," he says. "We can't take these extreme positions because people won't work with us. We'll be isolated on the wings. We should moderate and try to unify."

Telling anarchists they should moderate their politics is like telling Catholics they should moderate their child-bearing. It is not well-received.

Ah, but the Libertarian Book Club meeting is not what I want to talk about. I want to talk about the sex, inspiration and adventure of the weekend of Stonewall 25. Sure, that's what I want to talk about. Only there was no sex, inspiration or adventure.

Last year, I wrote about the great DC homomarch. Though I didn't like it, I had a lot to say about it. There were adventures, interesting people, frustrating events.

This year though I had fun with lots of folks who I had known only electronically, I had no adventures. I stayed inside most of the time-- away from the athletes, media, marches and unity displays. I should've kept the TV off.

A giant torch is in the center of Yankee Stadium. Their parents and friends fill the stands. The athletes of The Gay Games file in. Thunderous applause.

A young woman reporter interviews one of the athletes. The well-built young white man, with breasts out of a Nordic Track commercial, smiles in his ban-lon shirt.

"Why have you participated in this event?" asks the reporter.

"I've come to show that we're just like everybody else," answers the white guy.

Amazingly enough, my television screen is still in one piece. I did not put my foot-- or my copy of JULLIETTE-- through the screen shouting, Maybe you are, you motherfucker! But don't talk about WE! I'm pleased at my self control.

The whole weekend is a replay of this. Even before the UN march, the prissy Lesbian and Gay white collarites were pleading at the altar of pillar of societyness. In a cynical move toward that respectability, the march czars kicked NAMBLA and some leather folks out of the march. The group that sponsored the march-- a group looking for homo representation in the U.N.-- also voted out NAMBLA, although the boy lovers had been members from the beginning.

I'm glad I'm old. I remember when the National Organization for Woman pulled a similar trick on lesbos. They wanted to keep them out of the organization, warning against The Lavender Menace. NOW tossed homos to the wolves because they were not mainstream enough to meet their needs. Now the homos act the same way.

Throughout history, each little identity or minority group shits on another one. From the beginning feminists were among the great shitters. In the early 1900s. women worked for the right to vote. Elizabeth Cady Stanton, one of those suffragettes wrote a letter to the NY Times warning: "while sambo is marching up to the ballot box, think of us." Sambo, lavender menace, NAMBLA, there's always someone to shit on.

Not all homos went along with the ruse. An alternative, illegal march included NAMBLA, as well as most of the New York ACT-UP members.

Tolerated by the city, the news barely mentioned the march. One incredibly pro-Gay news program says only that the march "included ACT-UP and others who felt that the main parade didn't represent them." That's it. No mention of the REAL reasons for the "Stonewall was A Riot" counter-parade. Just praise from newsfolks and even the mayor. He says they're "well-behaved." The police arrest no one. It wouldn't look good. It's important to be nice and respectable-- on all sides.

That's what the press shows. Wholesome homosexuals, same as you and your mother. No leather queens or the boys in dresses. Nope, just lesbian moms, the rainbow flags and chants of "we are family, too!"

The only event that brings the slightest smile to my lips is the homosexual kiss-in front of the headquarters of the Revolutionary Communist Party. I can just see those knit-beret commies cringing at the sight of boy lips touching boy lips and girls with their own hard-ons. Even in the 90s the RCP party line is that male homosexuality is bourgeois. Lesbianism only exists because men are oppressors. If the oppression stops (after the revolution, of course), there'll be no more lesbians. No more lesbians!! Eeek! Count me in the counter-revolution!

If I weren't so averse to public displays of affection, I would go to that one. It isn't on TV.

What is on, is what "gay rights" is all about in the 90s. It's about joining the U.S. military-- the most deadliest most immoral force of the twentieth century. It's about the 'right' to marry, pair off into quaint little couples, and perpetuate the tyranny of the family.

Healthcare, free to 'spouses.' Singles pay. "Married couples" can adopt kids, singles can't. Gay marriage strengthens this inequality, further cutting off those of us who AREN'T like everybody else and don't want to be.

How could people march for that? It's like Jews marching for the right to join the Nazi party.

In her talk, Liz spoke about how we live in a sexually repressed society that takes that repressed sex, packages it and sells it back to us. Look at all the tits on beer adds for a quick lesson on how its done.

And the homos? Just like everybody else! The 'official program' for Stonewall 25 is a hundred pages of ads. Shocking Grey, the largest Gay mail order catalog, advertises two hundred dollar 'his and his silk sheets.' That is NOT something worth fighting for.

The more recent homo move toward mainstream totalitarianism and narrow self-interest matches similar long-term actions among the feminists. It's still going on. Look at the news.

First the press tries and convicts O.J. Simpson. The trial is a circus. Using this as a springboard, the liberal press and their feminist pals try to convict anyone accused of "domestic violence."

It's another sexist crime. (Men are always the perpetrators. Women are always the victims. My, what a change!) Every day at 11 o'clock we see another black-eyed woman, obviously, abused by her husband or boyfriend.

Surfing the wave of domestic violence hysteria, the NY legislature passed a law that requires MANDATORY ARRESTS where someone is accused of domestic violence. Talk about guilty until proven innocent!

Worse than that, the feminism that passed this law will end up murdering women. How many women call the cops just to break up a fight? They love (or fear) their husbands, but don't want them arrested. With this law in place, they now WON'T call the police, and might die because of it. In the past, the cops could have put some fear into the guy without carting him off to the slammer. Now, there's no choice.

Here in The City, the feminists of W.A.C. paste up posters that parody the "Zima" ads, with a big "Z" on them. The Z stands for "Zero Tolerance of Violence Against Women." (They don't go for euphemisms like 'domestic.')

"There's no excuse for violence against women." say the posters.

No excuse???? What about "I had to protect myself." or "I'm innocent! I didn't do it!"

Why bother having a trial? What defense can you offer if there is no excuse? It's all pretty scary. And guys on the street, in bars, writing for zines are too scared to do anything about it.

What about the ever-unpopular excuse She deserved it.?

The scene is Wetlands, a NY Club. CHAOS UK are playing. Big hair punks mob the pit. I stand in back. In front of me stands a girl, skinny, about 5'4". She's got a short mohawk in the middle of her shorter hair. On her back is a too big black backpack with at Chaotic sticker on it.

When the slamming starts, she waits until a male is within striking distance. Then she forces herself into the guy, pushing him away, into the thrashing crowd. Then she moves forward, waiting for her next victim. Eventually, this is not enough. She pushes back with fists flailing. Big guys, little guys, she pushes them all. They turn in anger. They do nothing, 'cause you're not supposed to hit a girl. This one should be hit.

Besides punching, what can we do about it? Between feminist bullies and mainstream homos, is it all a lost cause?

Just as it's long been time for the "good feminists" to abandon feminism, it's now time for the "good homos" to abandon the "gay movement." But more than that, just like it's time for enlightened anti-feminism, it's time for enlightened homophobia. By those terms I don't mean anti-women, or anti-folks who engage in same sex sex. I mean active antipathy toward personal identification with either gender or 'orientation.'

I want to see feminism destroyed, replaced by people-ism. I want people to no longer see themselves as gender-based victims, but as humans with equal rights based on that humanity.

I want to see "the gay rights movement" destroyed, replaced by a sexual rights movement that isn't bothered if people are NOT the same as everybody else. I want people to no longer see themselves as orientation-based victims, but as humans with an infinite variety of sexuality and (as long as its consensual) a right to that sexuality.

ENDNOTES:

-->Records to watch out for dept: POISON IDEA has teamed up with Ranter/Fringe culturites Adam Parfrey and ANSWER ME! 2 editor, Jim Goad. They're making an album called Cops are the Only Real People Left. Jim says it's "a musical tribute to law-enforcement with heavy C&W flavorings." Guess where it won't be reviewed, I'll bet.

--> The following is from Information Week May 9, 1994: Some unsuspecting New Yorkers are paying twice the usual rate to ride the Big Apple's subway system. That's because Metro-Card, a fare-collection card that's swiped through a computerized turnstile, often jams after an initial swipe, forcing a second swipe-- and a second fare deduction. Curiously, the Metropolitan Transit Authority says it has no plans to correct the problem.

--> I usually just toss press releases, but this one came in a hand-written envelope from a record company Fiction Records. I never heard of the label or the band, GOD MACHINE. Anyway, they asked me to pass the world along, so I will. Jimmy Fernandez, the bass player, died from a cancerous brain tumor. Makes you think doesn't it. Each moment could be...

--> I once complained about Amnesty International (322 Eighth Ave., New York NY 10001) because their definition of political prisoners did not include people who were prisoners because of consensual sex acts. So now, I get a form letter from them. Here's the quote:

...we extend "prisoner of conscience" status to anyone who is imprisoned solely because of his or her homosexuality, including the practice of homosexual acts in private between consenting adults. And to any person who is detained for peacefully advocating the rights of homosexuals. (underlining is theirs)

Is this a step forward? Of course not! It's just another step in the mainstreaming of homotude. Instead of extending the political prisoner definition to anyone imprisoned because of their sexuality, they split homos off from the rest of the (former) sexual outcasts and said, "You're ok.

How about the consensual coprophile exposed and arrested in England. Some killed themselves, others were arrested and imprisoned-- for hurting no one. But they're not homos and Amnesty International has nothing to say about them. Any homo with a conscience should be ashamed.

-->KSUN radio (c/o Father Tom, 1801 E. Cotati Ave., Rohnert Park CA 94928) is looking for "any non-commercial, non-corporate music that doesn't suck." I think it's a cable station, but I'm not sure.

--> Comedy record of the year dept: Yes! The new ANAL CUNT CD Everyone Should Be Killed. 58 'songs'-- not one intelligible lyric. All with names like Brutally Morbid Axe of Satan or Grindcore is Very Terrifying. Somehow they got on Napalm Death's label Earache and are distributed by a major label. If that weren't humorous enough, there is a warning "explicit lyrics" sticker on the front of the CD. Sure. How much more explicit can you get than: "Bluuurgh, arrgha awwwwaaawwwaaawww grrrrunt!"?

--> Another jail letter dept: Wayne Jandora (93-R-9116, Clinton Correctional Facility, PO Box 2001, Dannemore NY 12929) tells me that he wrote a 400 page prison novel and is looking for a publisher. If anyone out there has any suggestions, please send them. Also, as can be expected, the guy is lonely and needs friends. So if you've got a spare moment, write to him. I don't know what he's in for. In his letter to me it says, "I lived in Manhattan and ran the streets." Sounds good.

Wayne also writes about music, so write to him for reviews from the inside. (Now that Shane W. is out. Whoops, he's back in too. Ah well, write to 'em both then.)

--) The evils of the mayor dept: NY's mayor acts even worse news than we thought. He's in the process of clearing the booksellers off the streets. They were the one group that so-far had avoided the evil anti-street seller purge. (Off the streets into the welfare lines and jails.) They're using an obscure law that requires street sellers to remain 20 feet away from any doorway. Of course NO PLACE in the city is 20 feet from a doorway! (Info. provided by Harris Pankin who used to be in a band with the initials L.P.)

-->Joe Gervasi has produced another excellent issue of his 'zine NO LONGER A FANZINE. (142 Frankford Ave, Blackwood NJ 08102). In it, he interviews all kinds of right wing extremists who most folks wouldn't touch with a ten-foot microphone. He lets them speak for themselves too, rather than confronting them.

He's truly providing a marketplace for the exchange of otherwise hidden ideas! It's a great service and you have to be brave to do it. (My dream is to have a physical PLACE where people can come and say unpopular things, a publication is a close second.)

Unfortunately, Joseph's own opinions conflict with the concept of a free marketplace of ideas. Joseph believes that crips and tards should be killed. He's brave to say it, but he's wrong. Doing this says that the state, the group, the human race or whatever is more important than the individual being done in. In a free society, NOTHING is more important than the individual.

If I get around to it, I'll write a personal letter to Joseph. In the meantime, send him $2 for your own copy of the zine so you'll know what we're talking about.

--> Women are the victims? Dept: The following came from a message posted on The Internet on the Bisexu-l List:

You still a feminist?

-->Wet joys dept: I got two fine letters this last month. One from a boy who wrote: When I was reading about you and Lily in Asia I was so turned on that I masturbated thinking of us three being in that room. As a matter a fact, I am hard writing about it. Now, unless your name is something like Sooraporn Teeradek, I don't remember US THREE in any room in Thailand. But it's the thought that counts, and the thought is nice.

Even better is the letter from a girl who writes. I get the urge to masturbate WHENEVER I read your columns. (emphasis mine). People ask me if it's worth it doing this every month. I hope this answers the question. As usual you can help contribute to my pleasure by writing (or sending those videos!) to me at PO Box 137, Prince Street Sta, New York NY 10012 or via e-mail at mykel.wps.com.

-->Hot name of a hotter band dept: THE HIP NIPS played with my pals in IRON PROSTATE. Yeah, they're Japanese-- how'd you guess? They need a slight tune-up on stage presence, but musically! Wowee Zowee! It could be THE STOOGES! Watch for 'em before you have to pay $15 to see 'em. The singer says he's a pal of Roger Armstrong's-- but he isn't getting any anonymous messages from Roger.

-end-

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